According to me, myself & I!

Mood: Extremely sad

I hate cancer!

I had this great friend growing up that I love very much.

(this post is not about me – it is in honor of a man very dear to me!)

He was one of the very best guys I ever met. A true friend.

A friend in need is a friend indeed and this is what he was for me.

Thru lots of fun adventure we walked side by side and had so many laughs.

He grounded the friendship with his fantastic person and I have been honored to call him my friend over the years.

It feels cruel and unjust that he would have to deal with this cancer battle.

He and his family too created such a friendly and warm environment for us growing up and I spent lots of my time at his place. We played outside in the garden and were up to no good at times and we scrubbed our knees and climbed trees.

And the other day I found out that he passed away………..

There are no words for this and I cannot imagine the sadness and pain all his closest family and friends are going thru.

My own pain and sadness cannot in the slightest be compared to what loss they have been forced to realize.

Life created different paths for both of us but I still remembered him as one of my absolutely best friends ever. We were way different but still connected and had such a blast growing up.

When I moved back to the village about 8 years ago I ran into him at the local restaurant.

There he was standing with the same kind smile as I remembered growing up and all the years (about 15 years or so I think) and I felt such a warm welcome.

So I bumped into him over the years living here and we texted on birthdays and so on. Always with a smile and an uncomplicated mindset. He gave so much to me growing up and it was such a nice feeling to see him and that he had became a man equally as kind and wonderful as the boy I knew growing up.

And then it happened! I got the news that he was sick. The chock was horrible and I could barely believe it. This kind man that gave his surrounding such love and kindness thru his person was struck down but this horrible illness.

So unfair! But then again when is cancer ever fair?

So over the course of his illness I never saw him (In a way for me this might be a blessing for me as I never saw him deteriorate as a person)

We did exchange text messages and his spirit was always so high. He never seemed scared and even though the news of how bad the cancer was he never stopped being the guy with a smile.

I have heard from others too that all the way to the very end he smiled and planned for the future and this in itself makes it even more unfair.

His incredible strength throughout this terminal illness was more impressive than I can begin to express. He planned for the upcoming summer and for his 40^th birthday in August.

He had no intention of giving up at all. So brave and heroic!

The text messages we shared proved his person too.

He expressed his views on his situation and withheld all the time that he was glad that this happened to him and not to any of his friends.

He said that he would have been crushed by the thought of any of his friends became sick.

He felt it was right due to the fact that he lived at home with his mum and dad and did not have a relationship.

I was kind of blown away by this and I tried my best to tell him exactly how much he meant to me and the deep impact he had on my life when I grew up.

I cannot even imagine what a toll this time has been for his poor parents and my thoughts are with them and I just hope that there might be some comfort in the knowledge that their son was very much loved by so many people around this community.

It is no secret that my days in school were not the most pleasurable but I had the support of my dear friend thru so many hard days and I love him for it.

He made many a situation that was tormenting bearable.

I sincerely want to thank you Magnus for all the love you gave me growing up and that continued into adulthood when we got to catch up again.

I wish so much that you were still among us but in a way you are and you will always be.

The legacy you leave behind is one of love and laughter and the positive feelings that you shared with the world will make it a better place for sure.

I will honor you by living! Living to the fullest of my capacity and to remember you with a smile and share our stories with as many as I can.

For the time, however brief, I declare that it was indeed a privilege to have been fortunate enough to call you my friend.

I shall miss you terribly and I wish from the bottom of my heart that there was more time…..

R.I.P