Mood: Frustrated and sad
So I am confused!
Nobody can miss that I guess.
But what to do with all this? This frustration?
This life that is mine to take care of and nurture. Am I doing the best I can?
I am not sure of many things at all these days. From day to day it all changes and I cannot keep up the pace anymore.
I feel tired!
I feel so distressed that there is no direction that I feel that I follow. No goals really anymore!
It just flows nicely by and all I do is standing by and looking.
But this is my fr**king life right?
This cannot be it right?
I sure the hell hope not! I need more!
I need to feel the tingly happiness bubbling in me again. To laugh out loud and strong in the way that just brings light and glitter to once life.
To feel that I am living the right life! Walking the right road!
I wish there are some sort of sign that gave me the indication that I am on the right path.
Life is not at all bad or anything like that but I just have no clue what the heck I am doing anymore.
Why am I doing what I am doing?
Why am I living the way I do? For me or for the world/others that are close to me?
I want to feel safe and secure and able to meet the challenges that life provides.
At present I so am not ready for all this that is my life.
It feels hollow and empty and rather without meaning and purpose.
Being the energetic person that I am and not afraid of change makes me wonder if I should take another leap into the future and perhaps by doing that give me a boost in the right direction towards glittering happiness again…..
Well, over and out for now!
Xoxo
